Tetric (adj) : 1. a sensation similar to that of succeeding at Tetris, or anything that requires intense concentration for over three minutes < she had a tetric realization when the optical illusion clarified before her eyes >

2. when all of the notches and holes in any given situation fall into place, resulting in an all-over feeling of completeness and accomplishment.

i.e.,

"Dear Margaret:

Let me be the first to say, 'Congratulations!' I am pleased to tell you that you have been admitted to DePaul University as a member of the select group of students who will comprise the class of 2008. The Admission Committee has accepted your application based on academic achievement and strong personal motivation.

Yaddayaddayadda we love you like a fat kid love cake, see you next semester.

Your Number One Fan,
Carlene Klaas, Dir. of Undergraduate Admission"

Look out Chicago, this beast from the east is going to knock the wind right out of your city!

(Sorry, sometimes the tiny pro-wrestler inside of me needs to come up for air).

The more I find out about this school, the bigger my proverbial boner for it gets.

For instance, every student gets a free public transportation pass.

And they actually have a meal plan.

And dorms that aren't converted mental institutions and retirement communities.

And they're apparently nationally recognized and ranked as having the "happiest student body."

I don't even know how you can rate a school on its collective happiness, but I think it might have something to do with alcohol availability. Or just supreme location.

It's encouraging, in any case.

And yeah, kind of a bummer that I won't be studying acting. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that it's not the only thing I'm seriously interested about doing with my life.

I mean, there's a great job market out there for philosophers, right?

People could hire me to follow them around and dish out thought-provoking quips from Kant and Hegel that are relevant to their lives.

I could do for philosophy what Farnsworth Bentley did for professional umbrella holding.

I think I'm destined to be a hermit, because basically everything I'm interested in being falls into that "starving artist" caregory.

That is, of course, excluding the career choices of ice cream taster, replacement Maria on Sesame Street (only ever-so-slightly more pasty), and Astronaut Who Doesn't Have to do Math.

Actually, Astronaut Who Doesn't Have to do Math is probably more of a starving artist than an astronaut.

:-/.

P.S. - I did invent the word "tetric." You will give me a high five next time you see me.

<< >>