Ebonics takes a very active (albeit improper/non-traditional) voice. "I be __present tense verb__". That is so intense.

So anyway, I was going to upload some pictures but then my arm itched and I got carried away. I will, though. Sometime. (Said the procrastinator to the machine).

Also, I got my learner's permit. Also, I am 18.

Nothing else really new. Lindsay and I have been wreaking the usual semi-havoc on this little podunk town.

As my esteemed colleague Katie Farkas would say, "GIRLS GONE MILD... ! Woo, uh, hoo? (Expose small portion of wrist for the camera)"

For anyone keeping track, Project Megan's Secondary Education is being routed to Howard Community College.

I was going to take this semester off. You know, to masturbate and stuff.

And while I love myself and would totally do me if I weren't me and everything... there is just something so special about a boy-shaped hand to hold. It is the stuff bad 80's ballads are made of.

And there is a greater chance of me acquiring one of these said manhands if I venture to somewhere that is not my sofa.

But seriously, no, that's not my reasoning for going spring semester -- though it would be a very tasty bonus. I just think I'm going to get as bored as a rusty tuba if I stick around here, waiting until I can get back into the real life college circuit.

In the meantime, I can rid myself of liberal arts and visit my homies.

Community college: it's real college's kid brother who tags along even though everyone rats on it. It is the Marky Mark to the New Kids on the Block of education.

"Guys, can I come be famous too?! Donnie said I could-uh!"

So peace out, UFarts. Have fun being cold and unfriendly and mediocre and stuff.

I was like, "hey University of the Arts, I hear you're pretty average, but you gave me lots of money. Dass coo'."

And it was all, "hell yes, shawty! You's one fine ass talented bitch, and I will treat you like the lady that you are!"

And then I was like, "yeah? But will you give me a body massage?"

And it was like, "fo shizzle, my lizzle nizzle!"

And I was like, "oh yeah? But will you give me an education?"

And it was all, "uh, sweet thang? Who said anything about an edumacation, honey? I will pimp you out to the city, and make sure your living conditions are as uncomfortable as possible... but learnin'?! That I cannot do."

So I was like, "could you be any more trippin'?! I'm out like a fat kid in a not being fat contest. Yo."

But then it was like, "oh baby baby please don't go! I will sing Kenneth Sweat to you and rub you down with baby oil and feed you fine European cuisine!"

But by that time I had already walked away and given that trickass the "I don't THINK so, sweetie!" hand.

That's basically how it went.

I'm kind of kicking my senior year self right now, because this all would've been solved if I had just applied to the right schools last year. Bummered.

Oh well. At least I still have my striking good looks.

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