I am in the process of making the World's Best Kids of My Generation Super Nostalgia Funmix!

Starring the Presidents of the United States of America, Bush, Hootie and his Fantastic Blowfish, REM, Deep Blue Something, the Gin Blossoms, Semisonic, the Cranberries, and much, MUCH MORE!

This jam session will rock your artwork! And then it will dress up like a hotdog and play ice hockey and get hit a lot like the guys on Jackass, because that never stops being funny!

I forget who it was, but some guy was like "yeah, the Cranberries are all light and fluffy with 'Linger,' but then BA-NRNRNRNR-DRRRN DRRRN here comes 'Zombie!' I mean, what's up with that?!"

Just listening to Zombie with that in mind kind of ruins the intended tone of the song. The tone of "BA-DNDNDNDNDNDADA-DRRR!".

Or just listen to it back to back with Linger. Eeeeeha.

Man. Life is peachy. Peaches are... also peachy...

(you knew this segway was coming)

Millions of peaches, peaches for me!

Guess what, 6th grade me? That song has an underlying sexual metaphor! Doesn't that make it so much cooler? Cooler than a smiley face t-shirt?

("Shit, fool, ain't nothin' more silkyfine than a smiley face t-shirt.")

That last sentence is best imagined being said by Isaac Hayes.

Which makes no sense, because I was supposed to be quoting my 6th grade self.

But Mr. Hayes just came out, so I ran with it. I think that's what he would've said, too, had he been me in 6th grade.

Uh oh. I'm starting to not make sense. It's the overflow of 1997... IT IS FARTING ALL OVER MY HIPPOCAMPUS!

But it is also making me really really happy, and I'm not sure why. This must be what my parents feel like when they watch Woodstock.

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