So I just got back from some big pimping up in NYC, if "big pimping" to you means "auditioning for the University of Evansville."

(Which is located in Indiana, yet they hold auditions in New York. These are a backwards sort of people.)

I've already been accepted to their college, but you have to do a seperate audition for their "highly intensive theee-ate-er program."

It was one of the single most nerve-wracking things I've ever done. They only accept six female performance majors a year out of about a bajillion and a half prospectives... so I'm not getting my hopes up. The final verdict will be in in T minus 2 weeks.

Moving on.

Whilst in the big apple, I purchased a bag of Japanese gummy candy.

The description on the bag is slightly Engrish. Observe:

"Its translucent color so alluring and taste and aroma so gentle and mellow offer admiring feelings of a graceful lady. Enjoy soft and juicy Kasugai Muscat Gummy."

I'm not sure what a Muscat is, but the bag is covered with pictures of some kind of wacky grape. Judging by the taste alone, though, I think it's some kind of combination of grass and looseleaf paper.

So I really hate it how after you say "hi" to someone in the hallway you get this "after-smile" thing going on.

It's not quite a smile, but it's not quite neutral. I'm not really sure what it is. It's an awkward spectacle.

I can't really describe it accurately without you being right here, but it looks something like this:

Man, I really hate that shit.

Well, it's been fun and all, but I have to go watch American Idol now.

P.S. - This is what part of the alphabet would look like if "Q" and "R" were eliminated.

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