Ok, I know you guys really want to see the movie Fear Dot Com.

I know, the previews just leave you begging for more.

"Please sir, I want some more Fear Dot Com."

I know it's got some very famous, seasoned actors in it to draw you to the box office like a swarm of moths to a lamp.

And who could resist a movie with "Dot Com" in the title?

Especially... FEAR Dot Com.

It sends chills up my spine.

But please, at least consider the impact of this decision before your eager self run outs and buys a ticket.

Think about what could happen.

Thirty seconds into it you could realize, "hey, this movie sucks... and I have no money."

You could get scornful looks from the people in front of you because of the snide remarks you are making about the blatant predictability of the film.

You could feel weird because two girls are making out next to you.

But you know, if you still want to see it, don't say I didn't warn you.

Although some parts were funny. Like that part with the blind lady and the bad acting.

And the part with the website being "feardotcom.com".

And the part where she got the very, very dead girl out from the bottom of the lake and I thought it would be funny if she started giving her CPR.

If you're like me, you were probably forced into seeing it because it was Erica Sansing's birthday and she made you go see it with her.

But it was fun.

Despite the scornful looks.

And the lesbian action.

And the shitty plot lines.

And the overall suckiness of the movie.

But hey, if these people can be mildly successful actors... I should have no problem getting a job.

And if I don't, well...

There's always porn, right?

P.S. - I am writing an epic poem in Algebra 2 about nothing. Well, actually it's about a dorito. And Danny DeVito. And a burrito incognito. And other things that rhyme.

Because I hate that class and I think it would be neat if Mrs. Dykeytoast found me writing it and took it and read it.

Because I would intimidate her with craziness.

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